What does Fear have that God doesn't?

Fear has NOTHING! But if you let it grow, it can paralyze you, make you believe that you aren't good enough, it can make you take a different path than the one set before you by God. Fear is one ugly thing. But I believe that we all have a choice....do we let fear cripple our dreams or do we take faith and do what is right? Most of you don't know this, but I have developed a fear of flying. I know I know. I live thousands of miles away in the beautiful Sweden but have all of my family in South Florida. How will I go visit them? By boat?? Erm, that will take a long time. By car? Ha yeah right. So my best option is to...FLY! I have an upcoming flight in 6 months and just the thought of it is making me sweat, have the jitters and pray.

 This sudden FEAR of flying didn't start as a child. I flew when I was younger all the time but with upcoming movies with planes crashing and Denzel Washington flying upside down, this sister right here, is freaked out by flying. I have heard that car crashes are more common that airplane crashes, but does that help to hear it, eeeeh noooo. Haha. Nevertheless, as I think of all my family and friends and the grace of God, I depend on that flight to reach me to my loved ones & back. Getting on that plane doesn't mean I will not be fearful of them, I still will be, still I will hand over that fear to God. I will haunt that pilot until we land and gracefully thank him for landing me safely. *wink*

Beside my flight paranoia, have you ever been afraid of cutting your hair, asking someone to marry you, going out into the public and speaking, going to funeral, driving a car, moving 400 miles away, moving thousands of miles away, making love to your spouse, have you ever been so scared that you felt like there aren't answers or cures? Let me tell you, that the one and only person who was able to help me through my fears was Jesus Christ. My fears are not just about flying, but about not being the wife God created me to be, losing a loved one, moving to Sweden, and our life in Sweden, dying, etc. Before I became a Christian again, I feared being caught for my lies, being alone, feared that I was the reason for so many wrong things happening ,I feared a man's anger, I feared for my life. My fears kept me from sleeping, also I actually became really jittery that I didn't eat for a while. It stopped and paralyzed me from my dreams. I remember the day that I had asked my sister for the address to Calvary Fellowship. Fear didn't want me to go to church, fear wanted me to stay at home freaking out, however, I got the courage to go. And boy, did my experience change. I felt a huge weight of fear leave my body as I decided to accept God back into my life. This whole time, I knew that my fear wasn't mine to carry but His. He loves me so much that He gave His only son Jesus Christ and die for my sins! 

I also discovered that fear comes from the Enemy. He sits waiting for the next prey to fill lies and fear into. But as children of God, we have the power from the Holy Spirit to rebuke fear and lies from our path so that we can trust God with all we have. There are promotions that people have rejected because of fear, marriages that have gone sour because of fear of moving up to the next stage, fear of having a baby, lies made up to cover fear, whatever your fear is today, I am asking you, Is it really worth living in fear than giving it to God and having Him deal with your situations?

 If you are living a life of fear or confusion, I pray that you remember Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans for hope and a future." I pray that you give Him a chance. Your life will never be the same ;)


God Bless,


Ile

Update :D

Hello hello everyone! I've been on a total hiatus for the past month I believe. Super busy. I started SFI (Swedish For Immigrants) and it's been non-stop. For the past three weeks, I've been in class studying and craving to learn Swedish. It can be a difficult language if you let yourself think it's difficult, but if you go in with excitement and acceptance that it isn't your native language, than it will be easier. There's a Polish girl, 3 from Syria, 1 from Congo, and Israelite  1 from a country called Erythea, a couple from South Africa, a British girl, and also myself. First week of class, I got the most questions from my classmates. Such as "Why would you move here?" Me:" Because my husband is Swedish and because we wanted to start something in Sweden." "Are you a Christian?" Me:"Well yes,yes I am" "You look Hispanic" Me:" That's because my family is Puerto Rican *shows them in a map*" Oooooohh. Haha It's awesome.

We all seem to get along fairly well and to me, it's pretty awesome how so many people can be the same yet so different. We all have our reasons for coming to Sweden and let me tell you, mine seems like a fairytale compared to theirs. Some of these people have seen lives taken away, pastors be prosecuted, not have options but to leave the rest of their families behind, so many things. Leaving my family wasn't easy but being an American, I am so grateful that I was able to sleep peacefully while leaving there. Anyway, we're all different but amazing all the same.

My teachers speak to me pretty fast.....it has it's benefits and crazy moments where I just stare at her, asking in my head "What did you just say?!" Haha But either way, they say I'm learning pretty fast for only being there for three weeks. I even went to the Library and rented Children's book to help! (Thanks Annica for the advice). Teachers aren't really supposed to translate to you in English unless they see that you are very stuck, which is pretty often for me haha! But Lord willing, I will catch up soon. I am having more Swedish conversations with Kenny's family, so that's a plus.

-Now that "summer" is here, we are planting loads of goodies. My herbs are growing and so is our veggie garden. So far our Spinach, Lettuce, Dill, and Radishes are blooming nicely! I can't wait to try them. I am so excited! During the day is can reach about 80-90 degree on a good bright day, but at night it still drops to the 60's. Depending if it is raining, it will drop down to either the 50's-40's. I still love this weather though. I cannot imagine what the weather must be like in Miami. Though, when you want to go to the beach, you definitely appreciate the warm Miami waters.

-June is going to be an exciting month. My dad is coming on Saturday and 1 week and a half later my aunt will be here for a short time, but I get to see her. Yay! If there is one thing I miss from Miami, is my family. I miss them so much. I also miss all my crazy brothers and sisters in Christ. Ha! I love them so! 

June is also Kenny's and I's 1st Anniversary <3 I love him so much! This whole move and life transition has brought out so much in us. God is definitely doing something big IN and THROUGH us! We are still sticking to the word of God and will always be. He's given us so much and the things that He hasn't, well, they've been a blessing also. There's always a time for waiting, and I think being in a place where you can get anything 24/7 or not wait for things to happen, can make you take it for granted. Here, you have to be patient and willing to wait for things. Nah....maybe also God is just making us wait no matter where we are lol. 

-No babies yet for us. Just thought I'd throw that out there. We aren't ready for one, and who knows maybe you don't have to be, but right now isn't the moment...in all categories. So we are enjoying our moment of growing and settling down in Sweden ;) They're a wonderful gift, but nooooo,not now. I'd rather satisfy my maternal side with my friends babies or a dog for the moment lol.

-Will I move back to Miami? Who knows. But right now, I don't foresee that. I've grown to really like being here. The winters may kill me, so we'll see about that. I just find it so,freeing here. I don't have to be scared as much as I was in Miami, I can actually do things on my own and not worry. Not to say it's a perfect country but it isn't as dangerous.

-Last time I wrote, I still hadn't made a friend here. Well, it's the same. But since I have spoken to a lot of Swedes about that post, I believe I also have to make the effort. I'm super friendly, but I believe ever since I came here and the language barrier came to mind, I became shy. So now that I am studying Swedish, I believe it will be easier to actually have a full conversation with someone. They do speak English perfectly, but I am sure it isn't the same, and hey, I'm in their territory now ;) Maybe I am just crazy social lol Nah, they're wonderfully people here.....not to mention beautiful. Like seriously.

-On April 21st, I ran my first 5k!!!!! Yay!! I was so proud of myself. I ran it in 41 mins with some secs but I didn't care, the fact that I actually finished blew me away. I was incredibly dehydrated the first part of it due to me not being aware of the first water station but once I got to the second one, I drank up and felt so much better. I didn't get a cramp until I finished but it was a minor one. This was an all girls race, so Kenny waited for me at the finish line. I was so happy to see him. And got goodie bags. Yay!

-I got some huge news that my BF and her husband are having a baby! Ah! So happy for them! We love them dearly and are clearly overjoyed for them. I cried when I was told. God bless them always.

Phew okay I think I got through most of all of the highlights of the past month. I hope everyone is well. 

Love,

Ileana